yeah. it's a dandy warhols kinda week. (hint for understanding emma: when the dandy warhols come out, it's probably time to run for the tissues)
At the moment, my life kinda sucks. The perks of my week have been the little sewing parties I inspired...but I'm not even in the right sort of mood to really appreciate them. At least I made myself another cute bag. And a belt.
Other Perks: Watching Legally Blonde 2 with my parents. Because I love my parents, and I love that they watched that movie.
Listening to The New Amsterdams, Worse for the Wear. Awesome cd. If you visit their website, listen to the song on their intro page. From California. Very pretty. And addicting.
Wearing my pink hat today, with the pink and blue bag and belt I made myself, and my capris and blue shirt with the butterfly. Sometimes I need to match...I think it might be a control thing. I don't mind if the colors aren't exactly right, or whatever. I just need it.
Dusting the downstairs for my mother. Made me feel useful when I really needed it, and also gave me time to listen to music turned up.
Talking to my oma, who let me know that if I came and visited her, with or without boy, it would make her happy.
Not-Perks: general moodiness
work being so very awful
stressing out about money. again.
stressing out about using my time wisely. again.
getting myself addicted to Pyramids, because I don't want to do anything more productive.
not wanting to read anything at all, not even trash.
the sneakyness of the little boys, who manage to make me feel like a horrible person, and are the only people, children or adults, who have ever managed to make me really lose my temper.
the boy having fallen off the face of the earth.
my chapstick having fallen off the face of the earth, resulting in my dry lips.
the cut on the inside of my mouth that is driving me crazy
picking up Mod Ten again. Because I need that, really.
speaking of, not seeing dave for the few days he was home. just because once upon a time, he was one of my best friends. and because maybe we could have talked (now that I'm finally prepared to be reasonable). and because I don't want him to remember me that way.
having bitten all my nails
finally having to retire my glasses case, because it is dead. because I loved it.
having to buy a new band for my watch. because the one I have is so perfect...and getting so raggedy.
having work tomorrow, and having to go to bed.
not being able to go to spain this summer. and my family talking about going all together next year...which was kind of not the point. actually really not the point.
the high price of gasoline, which makes me unable to just drive around at night when I'm feeling angsty and not ready to go home like I did last year. (
Thursday, July 10th, 2003)
"no more sitting around, thinking about your hair...because I must have a door in the back of my head. yeah, I got a beautiful new asian girlfriend...she comes over and hangs around for days in my bed. yeah, you can't seriously believe I'm thinking about you, man. because I must have a door in the back of my head...where I can dump out all the crap so I can just feel solid again...yeah."
